Late Winter Blues Update - 1 Year without SAD
It’s a dim blue day, the raindrops are pattering slowly against my windowsill and I am sitting in my office with a hot oat milk latte reflecting on the fact that it’s been nearly a whole winter that I’ve been practicing SAD strategies. By SAD I mean seasonal affective disorder which I have been affected by since I can remember. I only learned there was a proper term for it recently and it made me feel not so alone in it. That’s why I wanted to share this little post in case any of you all struggle with it as well! The Mayo Clinic defines Seasonal Affective Disorder as “a mood disorder characterized by depression that occurs at the same time every year”. You know exactly what I’m talking about if you’re feeling a bit “off”, as per usual, this time of year - life feels hard to cope with, your soul is weighed down, and spring feels like a hazy, distant memory or strange dream. Can you relate to familiar February feelings of being depressed, mentally heavy, low energy, sluggish, hopeless, or in my case, as Mr. Bryant could confirm, making broad, dramatic declarations about how my life is in shambles, in utter calamity, and everything I can think of is going extraordinarily badly. I rant enthusiastically to him as we drive down the dark road at 5 pm about the demoralizing state of not possessing the right pair of jeans, the gruesome way I feel bloated after eating corn chips, rejection of my tan-faded winter body (unsurprisingly this feeling came on after falling down a youtube rabbit hole of bikini models) and my newfound (read: temporary) despair and confusion about the next step in my life’s calling. All these problems take on paramount end-of-the-world importance and forebode disagreeable disaster on a rainy evening in February. The problems are actually February’s fault, but that’s not obvious to me in the moment. Mr. Bryant calmly replies that perhaps it’s not so bad as all that and I should consider rethinking it when the sun comes out after a good night's rest. He knows. It’s a mostly true story. In all seriousness, I’ve always felt a deep sense of dread for winter, the way it engulfs you in its dead, cold, unfriendly landscape, and the way it seems to mercilessly never end here in Virginia. My heart goes out to you if you resonate with what I’m talking about. It’s really no fun, is it? Don’t worry, though, hopefully, what I’ve learned can help!
Last year I determined to see what I could do about all this, Mr. Bryant being gratefully supportive, and discovered many helpful cures both from research as well as from discovering them on my own through trial and error. I experimented all last winter and found great success. I knew I was onto something when I kept exclaiming “I don’t even feel like it’s been winter!”. I was happy! Mr. Bryant was relieved! Everything was very wonderful. It was as if my body and soul hadn’t even registered what was going on, that it was winter, and weren’t issuing the standard (unpleasant) responses in me. I realized that the reason it didn’t feel winter to me was because I associated winter with the unpleasant feelings described above - the feelings caused by the season, rather than the season itself. This winter, I put what I learned to the test all winter long by seeing if I could go the entire winter without experiencing SAD symptoms. I wrote my last blog post about my findings almost exactly a year ago, and I thought it would be fun to follow it up and see how I fared after testing my remedies over the long haul. It turns out, they were extraordinarily successful, and the way I flourished during this winter is significantly different from all the years before. I believe I’ve fully kicked Seasonal Affective Disorder for good! In the rare occasion it rears its ugly head I recognize it immediately and am able to get back on track within a day. So, here’s a synopsis of what has worked so wonderfully for me!
S u n - b a t h I n g - Ki s s e d b y t h e s u n ! :
If you could change just one thing, I believe sun exposure has been the most highly impactful for me in overcoming SAD! I highly prioritize sun exposure in my life. It’s wild how much spending time soaking in the sunshine affects me positively! It works better than any medicine or drug I know of and it comes at no cost - just the intentionality to value it. Getting 15 minutes of sunshine a day is enough to make a significant difference, but I stay even longer if I can!
I hear some of you objecting that the sun is bad for your skin, especially with the current trend of wearing sunscreen every single day. However, after researching and experiencing it first hand I believe not getting any sun in winter is far more detrimental. Dave Asprey even says so! You see, your skin slowly builds up melanin over time, so the sun will not harm or damage your skin if you slowly and mindfully increase time spent in the sun as melanin increases. This is how we are created to work. If you were to lay in the sun for an hour when you are pale in the middle of winter, that could obviously contribute to wrinkles or skin cancer. However, if you start with just 5 minutes and slowly work up to 15 or 20, you will be greatly benefited. Getting sun-kissed is beneficial, burning is harmful. I always know when my skin is getting too hot and I can feel the sun’s rays piercing my skin in an unhealthy way, and I stop sunbathing! All it takes is being mindful and aware of what is healthy, and what is too much. Listen to your body and it will tell you.
To make this a priority, each person will have to creatively weave opportunities to sun-bathe into their every day lives in simple, consistent ways. Just find something that works for you! I delight in the moments I get to have my daily dose of sunshine. We have a comfortable couch that is facing out toward some big windows, and I like to sunbathe there in just my knickers on my lunch break. Oh, how joyous! How glorious! I feel amazing after. I’ve noticed that after coming home from spiritual mentoring and therapy appointments, when I’m totally emotionally and physically drained, taking a 15-minute rest in the sun will rejuvenate my energy and I can get up and go about my day with zest afterward.
I’m still learning about all the benefits of light, but here are a few of the reasons this works so well (outside of that beams of sunshine simply make you FEEL cheerful in your soul!).
The sun causes our bodies to produce vitamin D; it converts hormones in your skin, LDL cholesterol, into vitamin D. The sun helps you absorb the vitamins and minerals from your food, helps your immune system and helps your good gut bacteria. There are receptor sites for Vitamin D on every cell in your body! Think about how significant this is. Your body is made of millions of cells, all needing Vitamin D to function. If you aren’t getting sun, every cell in your body is missing out. No wonder we get grumpy!
The other important benefit of light exposure is that it causes your body to produce melatonin naturally - 15 minutes or more of sunlight in the morning is optimal for great sleep. Melatonin is produced just the same if it’s cloudy out. Many people who have SAD can experience poor sleep, and the sun is a great solution. I see melatonin often recommended as a sleep supplement, however, taking it consistently over a long period of time can be detrimental for your sleep because your body will stop naturally producing melatonin and you’ll become dependent on the supplement. We only use it when we have jet lag or when we are changing our sleep schedules. Give your body the chance to take care of you and allow yourself morning light instead.
I’ve realized recently that when it’s rainy for days or weeks on end and my dose of sunshine is seldom it just doesn’t quite cut it. I am considering trying out a light box that I can have on my desk. I’ll report back on if it’s helpful! I don’t think anything can quite substitute the sun itself, but (hopefully) it’s worth taking advantage of this technology for cloudy periods. I’ll probably order one on amazon, here: (link)
C a n d l e s
Candles are surprisingly helpful for the endless winter days when the sun stays more down than up. They help to alleviate both the internal and external darkness engulfing us. Regular lights don’t have the same effect. I use candles every single day - I think they show up on my Instagrams a lot and that is just because they are always with me!
I light them first thing when I wake up, if I’ve risen before the sun, to make those wee morning hours of devotional time more delightful. It’s a very pleasant, cozy way to welcome the day, especially when bright light bulbs are too intrusive for sleepy eyes. I sit with them journaling, praying, meditating, checking in with goals, setting intentions, and reading.
As dusk approaches and I am working away in solitude at my desk I feel a deep sense of sadness and longing in my soul - it’s hard to explain. The sharp outlines of frozen trees are illuminated by desolate headlights of tired people driving home from long days of work and disappear again into the dark. It fills my heart with ache and gloom for no reasonable reason. I jump up and quickly shut the curtains and light my candles, startling away the loneliness creeping in at the corners, and the room fills with the satisfying glow of light playing on the walls and ceiling. Instantly, the room is filled with coziness and my heart is filled with cheer! Sometimes I put on some soul-soothing music, make tea and start vegetables roasting in the oven so that an aroma floats through the house to greet Mr. Bryant, who is one of those tired souls traveling home after a long hard day at work. We greet each other joyfully and the long hard day feels meaningful. It is winter, but we have our candles and we have each other. There is no room for the dreary dreadfulness to come in. The atmosphere is homey, serene, hyggelig and soul-pleasing. All these things create a cheery, cozy, alive place to be - a safe, happy oasis from the world outside.
For candles, I use brass candlesticks. I like how sculptural and elegant they look as opposed to squat candles in glass. They bring instant charm. I collected mine slowly from thrift shops and antique shops for our wedding feasting tables, and now I used them daily in our lives. They remind us of an important part of our story.
Note - if you’re fortunate enough the own a wood fireplace like we do, this greatly increases the hygligg feelings when you lay around it with your loved ones with a good glass of red wine and a good book! This is one of my favorite things in the whole wide world.
N o u r I s h Y o u r B o d y
Learning to nourish my body well is an integral part of getting out from underneath the heavy cloud of SAD. About a year and a half ago I began pouring into educating myself because of some health problems I was going through, and I spent every spare moment I could hungrily learning about holistic health and the way the body functions optimally. The more I studied the more I realized how crucial this physical health is to mental health. At the time, this was a new concept for me. Now that I’ve experienced the difference it feels obvious! The changes I have made since then have been transformative for my physical and mental health and ultimately this also dramatically changed my experience of SAD. I made the switch when I was struggling with a bought of depression. I cut out gluten, sugar, dairy, processed foods, and other inflammatory foods like canola oil and vegetable oil. I hadn’t realized how sick, sluggish, bloated, and blah I really felt until I made the change! I never knew I could feel this great, this alive! These changes have become permanently apart of my lifestyle and they now hardly take any effort! I learned to cook whole, nourishing meals. Not only I have found this way of eating more delicious, but also as a result I feel physically thriving both after each meal and also as a state of being. If you want to experiment with how nourishing your body affects your mental health and make a lifestyle change, you’ll find the book “A Mind of Your Own” by Kelly Brogan M.D. very helpful. She explains both exactly how what you eat changes your mental state as well as the effects of medication. I highly recommend this book!!
It’s better to focus on giving your body the nutritious foods it craves to thrive rather than focusing on what you are depriving yourself of. Enjoy lots of winter vegetables (such as squash of all types, carrots, beets, onions, zucchini, and sweet potatoes) roasted in the oven, hearty veggie soups or Thai soups, aromatic slow-roasted whole chicken, veggie laden quiche… I could go on! I love using herbs, seasonings, quality oils, and cooking techniques to make these nourishing foods super tasty. Your body needs the hearty warm foods that are naturally available in winter, so eat what’s in season! For fruit, oranges are a treat and provide the exact vitamins we need in winter. How wonderful that God designed the things in season for winter to carry the exact nutrients our bodies need to thrive in winter! I’ve also learned to bake desserts made from real, whole ingredients that are nourishing for the body. Besides how tasty, fresh, wholesome, and essential for mental health this lifestyle of feeding your body is, there is the added bonus that I haven’t suffered from the extra pounds of winter fluff that normally come to join me in winter, which is really nice!
S u p p l e m e n t s
Taking care of your body through what food you put in it is of highest priority, but there are some supplements you can add which can make an immense difference as well. I think giving your body the vitamins and supplements it needs is a great form of self-care!
It’s a flowering plant with anti-depressant qualities. I truly think it works. If you’re unsure, reading the Amazon reviews is helpful! I have this one.
A b-complex can help give you energy for your day. It’s important to take a complex because the B’s need to work together to be effective. I take this one: B-complex by Dr. Axe
Since we are in short supply of the sun in winter, a vitamin D supplement can really help! You can get tested to see what your levels are if you want but I’ve heard many of the experts say they believe everyone is much too low. Vitamin D3 by Dr. Axe
Your gut health is crucial for everything, including depression. I read a fascinating study where participants took a probiotic for depression for 30 days with outstanding results! 90% of serotonin, the happiness hormone, is produced in our gut. This is a little scary considering that our food, like meat and diary, and our water is constantly killing our microbiome unless we are not intentionally avoiding it. Unless it’s specifically listed, animal products are injected with antibiotics systematically, so make sure what you buy is labeled “no antibiotics”. Also, Drs. regularly prescribe antibiotics to many people in a city. What happens when the antibiotic is excreted? It goes into the city water, and the city does not filter it out (there are many other things in the water such as birth control . The more research you do the crazier it gets!) That’s why we have a Berkey. It will take the gut 5 years to fully recover from just one round of antibiotics! Another reason why it’s important to be supplementing with probiotics.There are many benefits of probiotics outside of mental health (such as lowering cholesterol and improving your skin), and a healthy microbiome is key for great health! If you want to know more, read “A Mind of Your Own”, “You Can Fix Your Brain”, or “The Mind-Gut Connection”. Make sure you take a good one - if it’s not properly formulated, the living probiotics could be killed by gut acid before they reach the area where they are needed. I’d recommend these two:
By the way, if you click through my link any of these books or supplements from amazon or download a book from audible your effort goes to support this blog and help me be able to keep running it! Amazon will approve me to be an associate after 3 purchases are made through my links, and I’ll be really excited when that happens! I’m grateful that one my last post, I had a purchase but didn’t know who it was and so didn’t know who to thank! If you purchase anything, I’d love if you could comment it below so that I can know who it was and thank you!!!
There are a few more supplements that are also important - here’s a video that goes through them by a youtube channel that I love, Pretty Well.
W a r d r o b e !
This is going to sound crazy, but I’ve found this crucial in my journey defeating SAD: I switched to wearing only natural fibers. I’m not 100% sure of why this phenomenon takes place: all I know is that it does and I’m grateful to know about it and therefore act accordingly. Fake fibers - polyester, acrylic, nylon, etc make me feel HORRIBLE in winter. They make me grumpy! They make me sweaty! They make me feel irritable, gross, unpleasant, yuck and moody. I believe it is because your skin absorbs 64% of the chemicals just from water running over your skin, and 100% of perfume you spray on it, so it makes sense that your skin would be absorbing a heavy-duty amount of the toxic chemicals that polyester and like fabrics are made from and processed with. Natural fibers come from nature - good ole straight from the mouth of God. However, the cheap, fake, fibers (which are made from oil mind you) are exactly what most fast fashion pieces are made of, so becoming aware of this has helped me even more to support ethical, sustainable brands, and eco friendly brands (something that is important to me). I enjoy buying fewer things and invest more into what I do buy. I supplement the rest of my closet by thrift hunting. Any false fiber pieces are long gone from my wardrobe now and I only bring new pieces in that are up to my standards - things made from cotton, wool, cashmere, silk, linen, rayon, viscose, and fur. I enjoy the way that these real fibers give me a wabi-sabi, homey, feel and it makes my wardrobe look and feel high quality as well. I’m really really happy with this change and the results it has had!
I’ve also taken care to enjoy a bright and light style that makes me happy and feels more “me”. I used to think the things winter-appropriate were dark imposing colors, dark lipsticks and heavy make-up, which either results in looking like a grunge London teenager in the ally or their very posh mother having drinks at an upscale lounge with business associates. I don’t see myself in either of these characters, so these days I just stay true to myself and my own style. I wear very minimal makeup in even fresher tones, which I feel is very refreshing in winter and keeps you looking like you’re healthy and thriving (rather than slowly shriveling away under those winter layers). I prefer seeing myself fresh, it makes me happier. If nothing outside is blooming, allow your own beauty to shine out. I also choose the colors that suit me best and that I enjoy - cozy creams, soft tans, pale yellows, warm browns, vibrant red hot accents, and bits of healthy greens. These colors are pleasing to my eyes and I feel at home and can stand tall in them.
E x e r c i s e
Exercise regulates hormones and is amazing for our brains. I’m sure you’ve already felt the difference it makes mentally. I know it’s challenging when you are already low energy to make the effort to exercise on top of everything else. Listen to what your body really needs and don’t make exercise a stressful part of your life, otherwise, you’ll have an even harder time actually doing it because you’ll dread it! Try something small and simple.
I listen to my body and do what it is most craving and needing and have few different favorite options in my repertoire. I think hot yoga is wonderful in winter because it heats you all the way to the bones and is so restorative. I feel amazing after! Often my body says to me that I need to really get my heart rate up and my blood flowing to deliver nutrients all over my body to feel really great! Sometimes I need a really hard workout to feel fresh and rejuvenated, like HITT or weight training. I know I feel really amazing when I get my heart rate up and push myself harder than I think I can. It gives me energy and focus for the whole day!
I know both from experience and from researching the topic that working out makes a huge difference with depression. Workout for your mind and emotional state if nothing else - you don’t even have to think about getting into shape or put any pressure on yourself to be fit. You’ll see the difference in your mental health right away. If you find yourself feeling bad just set the timer and go walk or put on a youtube yoga video for 10 minutes, you will feel so so much better!
S l e e p
This is one I haven’t mastered yet, but I’ve made it a high priority because I know how important it is! Nothing in our human system is isolated - it all works together in a big spiral for better or worse. Eating well and getting sunshine will help you sleep well, sleeping well will give you energy for getting a good workout and getting a good workout will help you eat and sleep well, and so on and so on. All of these things get you further and further away from feeling SAD. As you cultivate new ways of being, the change becomes permanent. Everything affects everything. Your physical and mental states are integrally tired together. This is why good sleep is key. If you want to learn more about sleep, read “Sleep Smarter” by Shawn Stevenson. He covers everything. Some important points are:
Make sure to be in bed by 10 pm because the most important hours of sleep are between 10-2 and this will set your circadian rhythm for optimal sleep at night and high energy during the day.
Exercise (ideally in the morning) makes a huge impact, as does eating well!
It’s a good idea to not drink caffeine in the afternoon after 2pm because it will keep you from a deep, rejuvenating sleep. I’ve quit drinking it at all and this has made the biggest difference of anything for my energy levels and hearty sleep at night. Even if you think caffeine doesn’t affect you because you fall right to sleep when you have it, it does - you’re asleep, but it’s “empty sleep” - it’s not quality sleep.
Stay away from blue light (screens) or wear blue light blocking glasses a few hours before bed. I notice a massive difference with this one - I feel naturally, wonderfully sleepy when I read rather than be on my phone before bed and I sleep more deeply.
Allow your mind to calm down to prepare for sleep by staying away from things that will perk it up (like movies, work, social media, etc). Have tea and read a calming book or chat with your loved ones instead!
Make sure your room is completely dark at night. This one made a huge difference for us.
You should associate your bed with sleep and intimacy, so don’t spend time browsing online or working or eating in bed.
C u l t I v a t e Y o u r E n v I r o n m e n t :
We are a product of our external and internal environments. If your space is disorderly and overwhelming, your mind will feel that way too. I’ve felt a greater sense of calm and happiness as I continually curate and organize my space. I think often times our external world reflects the turmoil or peace residing within, so if you’re not feeling great mentally there’s a chance your environment is mirroring it. Reversing the state of the external world will help reverse the state of the internal world.Think about it, you are living with your stuff all winter, surrounded by it. Hopefully, it is stuff you like, use, truly treasure or enjoy! Get rid of whatever you can and to deep clean every nook and cranny. Sometimes even cleaning your refrigerator can put you in a great mood (restock it with nourishing foods while you’re at it). Into my clean space, I choose to bring only good and life-giving things - aromatic lilies, essential oils, candles, 1860’s Italian jazz, hearty foods, and uplifting guests.
Equally important is our internal environment. I caught myself feeling really ick the other day, in a plain ole bad mood. I stopped to evaluate and realized that I had been allowing influences into my mind that were not at all uplifting of life-giving. My mood was a product of my internal environment. Try to avoid movies, social media influencers, youtube videos, and news that will only bring you down. Be honest with yourself. I think creating an inside atmosphere of gratitude can also change everything. Being able to reframe your perspective, find the good in life and in people, and not project negativity does wonders for our internal environment! It’s difficult, but when you stick with it it becomes a fruitful habit.
C o n n e c t i n g t o N a t u r e
Getting fresh air in winter is crucial! Think about it, we live shut up inside all winter, breathing in our house, in our car, in our work, and back in our home again. I believe there are important nutrients in the air that we need. I know that just one long day flying and being in airports without any fresh air makes me feel sick and claustrophobic, and being inside for a full winter isn’t much different. I try to combat this by taking a short daily afternoon walk. I exercise in the morning, so my walk is purely for pleasure, to enjoy being outdoors and breathe in big sips of crisp air. The cold feels foreboding but when I bundle up in my husband’s down jacket and my beanie it’s not at all! It’s quite pleasant. I think wintry walks around the city and a stop in for coffee or a day snowboarding are also a really nice way to get out. You will feel happier, healthier, more energized, clear-headed and alive!
Another way to connect with nature is grounding! When your bare skin contacts the ground, your body pulls up electrons from the earth that act like antioxidants in the body (antioxidants combat free radicals preventing oxidative stress which is aging and deterioration). Here’s a podcast explaining the topic better than I could!
T a k i n g T i m e t o e n j o y be i n g y o u
What is it that makes you feel energized, inspired, and just more like “you”? Kick-boxing, hot baths, reading old books, coffee with a friend, seeing a comedy, overcoming a big challenge, making yourself a gorgeous meal, or snowboarding perhaps? It’s different for everyone. Do something that makes you feel happy and come alive! Try to find time to do these things regularly. For me, recently, it has been my spiritual walk with God and the things I’ve discovered both about myself and about Him have been shocking, wonderful, exciting and make me feel more alive. That has really energized me. I love swimming more than anything and we go swimming at our gym in the evenings. I also feel great spending time with other wonderful women. It’s very helpful for me not to be holed up all winter like a lone hibernating bear. I also love filling my days with learning interesting and exciting things from books and podcasts. That’s one way I discovered out how to overcome SAD! I’m sure the things you love are already coming to mind. Maybe make it a priority and put one of them on the calendar today!
That, dear angels, is what worked for me. If you’re struggling with SAD, I am so sorry. I know exactly how you feel. It’s just miserable! I’d love if you wanted to reach out to me and we could chat about it! I’m here for you and with you. I hope that what I learned on my journey might help you on yours.
I never knew before that I could feel better - I used to just accept that this was the way it was! I never could have imagined how good I feel now. I have focus, energy, clarity of mind, and best of all I feel happy and full of life! These strategies were one big fat success for me! The reason it’s been the most life changing of all is because now I can do and be the things that are important to me, rather than giving my time away to SAD! I’m honestly amazed at how well I feel. I’m very, very grateful!
On most days I feel amazing, but on the rare occasion I’m feeling bad and SAD I’ve now cultivated awareness and the skills to re-direct myself back into happy aliveness! For example, yesterday I noticed myself receding a little in my behavior and feeling like SAD was lurking nearby. I was able to stop and become aware of what was going on. I realized that I hadn’t gotten out for fresh air walk in a few days because it’s been raining for what feels like an eternity. I realized I needed to just don my galoshes and take my umbrella and walk despite the weather. I also realized I had spent time that day consuming content that was far from uplifting - I’d allowed myself to fall down a youtube rabbit hole. My mood was simply a product of the environment I had allowed myself to dwell in. I realized what would really make me feel great is doing something I am passionate about and working hard at it - which is why I am writing this blog post, now! I’m passionate about other humans not having to keep suffering the way I was. Because I caught myself at the first symptom, I could act. I was able to go to bed early and wake up refreshed today in a new frame of mind even though it’s still rainy. It was only one day of SAD rather than a whole winter, or a whole lifetime of winters. I’m very grateful for the tools I now have to navigate those kinds of days and get back up.
I know this is a lot of info and it can feel overwhelming if you’re starting from square one, but going through the effort is a whole lot better than having to experience SAD all winter! These tools are available to you and are totally doable - I know because I did them and if I can, you can! Dare ya to just try it out for a few weeks and see how you feel. It will be challenging, but as you stick with it you’ll find yourself feeling more and more full of life and happiness and it becomes second nature. You’ll find you WANT to do these things. If I had to pick just a few strategies to start out with, I would choose: getting sun, eating right, exercising or getting outside, and wearing natural fibers. If you do this, I believe you’ll feel much better within two weeks - for me, it was even less. It’s one of those things that as you stick to it, it takes on momentum and gets easier and easier. Just make a commitment to try this for a few weeks, put a date on the calendar, and start!
By the way, if you click through my link any of these books or supplements from amazon or download a book from audible your effort goes to support this blog and help me be able to keep running it! Amazon will approve me to be an associate after 3 purchases are made through my links, and I’ll be really excited when that happens! I’m grateful that one my last post, I had a purchase but didn’t know who it was and so didn’t know who to thank! If you purchase anything, I’d love if you could comment it below so that I can know who it was and thank you!!!
B o o k s M e n t i o n e d :
“Sleep Smarter” by Shawn Stevenson
“A Mind of Your Own” by Kelly Brogan MD
“You Can Fix Your Brain” by Dr. Tom O’Brian
“The Mind-Gut Connection” by Emeran Mayor MD
